How a divorced saved her life?
She says,”The divorce saved my life; my health has deteriorated for a while cause of the stress of being with him and had to deal with his sisters and cousin. My blood count was declining cause I was losing blood during my monthly menstrual. I took energy chewing candies that he had in the house to keep up with his schedule, and the side effect was not good since I was taking hyperthyroid medication every day. I got jealous of his sisters cause they were each sick, and he showed that he cared about them, and he was sensitive to their illness; meanwhile, I had been dealing with my thyroid for so many years, yet he was very insensitive toward me. I had to perform and be strong whether or not I was feeling good or sick. I drank red bulls like water to keep my energy up, and I took extra thyroid pills to give me more power. We had no health insurance cause we were keeping up with the Jones; when I had the children, I needed the WIC for them, but he said no cause he felt it was a disgrace. My children went without a lot of things because I had to sacrifice for the business also. I was so angry sometimes because he’s ex-wife did not help except when the children went on vacation with her; they came back with expensive toys, sneakers, and clothes; of course, she was able to do that because the rest of the year, she was not contributing to their well being. I called her Santa Claus.
Since he took my name out of the bank accounts, I had no saving accounts, and I was sick; my only choice was to ask the Government for help. I was not qualifying for unemployment because since he quit the second business, none of my stuff was getting paid. I had to stand in line for long times and dealt with people with some disabilities, but my social worker would tell me to keep my head up no matter what. I had to keep taking care of myself by doing my hair, dress nice, do my manicure and pedicure; I learned to do my hair myself instead of counting on my sisters to help me.
I took a workshop class at the college, and they told me to dress the way I want to be at not where I was at that time, so I wore my lovely dresses to classes and got nice comfortable, professional shoes that I can walk with.
Because of the Government’s help, I have insurance to get my health back on track. I was able to have surgery and a different test to determine what was not right with my health. I went to the hospital early in the morning for treatments before my classes. I aimed to get better and finish the courses.
Did you know that if one member is doing poorly financially in the Jewish culture, they help that person because they realize that it is not the person’s fault most of the time? I asked my ex for the divorce because I was dying, and with my personality, I trusted his words that he would do the right thing by me always because, as he said, “you are a great mom.”